His Sacred Name - An Easter Declaration

I am more grateful for His atoning sacrifice each day of my life!

Sacrifice

Our lesson today in RS was on Sacrifice. When we were asked to tell ways we sacrifice, I kept thinking of Sammy and how we had to let her go. Then the question entered my mind, Is it a sacrifice if we don't have a choice? It feels like a sacrifice to me!! I asked a friend that question. She asked me, do we ever not have a choice? I told her we didn't get to choose for Sammy to die. Her response to me was, "Yes, but you do get to choose how you handle her death." So my conclusion is that yes, losing Sammy is a huge sacrifice! The biggest sacrifice in my life! Did we choose for her to die? NO! We did not! Do we accept it as God's will? Yes. Then I have to ask myself, How am I handling her death? My answer is somedays, not so great. I pray I am learning what I need to from this experience so I will NEVER have to go through it again! I pray I am passing the test.

New Job

I had a job interview today and got the job. In the next few weeks, by the first part of May at the latest, I will begin working at the National California/Oregon Trail Center. I'm excited and a little scared. I have never acted before, except in skits for church, and the new job requires some acting. When I am at work, I will be myself in 1852. My work dress will be pioneer dress. Should be interesting. I'm hoping it will keep me busier so I don't have time to think. When I have too much down time, I think too much and then I get really sad. With RS, quilting, and the OTC job, I should be busy enough. I hope my family will understand that I have to do this right now to stay sane.

The New Feel of Sunday

Since March 13th, the day Sammy died, Sunday has taken on a new feel. It started again this morning for the third week in a row. I go to bed Saturday night, sleep well, and yet wake up Sunday morning in a funk. As the day goes on, I feel more down by the hour. Is this how Sundays are going to be from now on? I'm trying so hard to keep the Sabbath Day holy by not sewing and not doing things I do on other days. The empty time during the afternoon and especially during the evening leaves me way too much time to think. I'm not looking forward to tonight because Laura and the little girls will be leaving to go home and Eugene will be leaving to go to work, all around the same time. Five p.m. is way too early to go to bed. What can I do with myself to stay busy and keep my mind occupied? Oh! Please let Sundays get easier!!

So Grateful

Last Sunday was the most difficult day since the day Sammy died. I didn't feel well and I just couldn't find peace. I cried most of the afternoon and evening. Finally I called to talk to my SIL. She suggested I get a blessing that night and go to the dr. the next morning. Because she is so wise, I followed her advise. Eugene gave me a wonderful blessing and I have been at peace ever since. I went to the dr. Monday and am feeling much better, which makes coping much easier.

I am so grateful for family who love unconditionally, friends who care, for the gospel, for the power of the priesthood. Grateful for the Comforter.



This morning I needed to scan a document so I got my camera memory card and put the document on it. When I looked at the document, all the pictures on my card came up. The last two that were taken were of me and Laura's four girls sitting in the big rocker. That is the first blessing for today. I am so so grateful for those pictures. They were taken the one and only time all four girls were at our house. I'm not a big picture taker so I must have been prompted to have those pictures taken. So grateful I listened and acted that time.